Maryory and baby Anastasia

Testimony of a Madre Fénix from Venezuela

April, 2020

Hi all, my name is Maryory Matos, I am 34 years old and last year on January 2019, I found out that after 8 years I was about to be a mommy again (I have a daughter). I couldn’t believe it as me and my husband had been trying to get pregnant for four years, we were so happy to live the dream of paternity all over again. He wanted a boy and I simply wanted my baby to be healthy. Since the beggining, my pregnancy was a little delicate due to a chorial hematoma placed above the embryo sac, I was in bed since the very start. It took a while for the chorial hematoma to dissappear but eventually it did, but by ending May I was diagnosed with stage II cervical cancer, they asked if I wanted to continue my pregnancy and my answer was of course yes, without even thinking about it because a new life was growing inside me, the greatest dream, I could feel her kicking! Every ultrasound was an unnerving experience but I always had faith that it will be all right for both of us. My baby arrived on July 27th with 30 weeks weighing 1.317 kg but on the first week her weight dropped to 1.100 kg. When my daughter weighted 1.620 kg they allowed us to bring her home saying she had a “perfect” health condition, but on the fifth day she was having apnea of prematurity and was hospitalized again. At that time she became very sick due to a hospital infection at the point of being intubated. My husband and I felt in a roller coaster every day, however, our little warrior got better day after day and on November 6th we brought her home with oxygen because her lungs were affected by a severe
bronchopulmonary dysplasia.

Even so we had the perfect Christmas, it was joyful! Her sister was happy as her four grandparents, uncles and family of having her home. On February she no longer needed oxygen, we went to the pediatrician, we worked on her early stimulation exercises, she had her vaccines and when the time come she had her porridges and fruits, we we so grateful with God. After she left the oxygen she had a cold that passed quickly, but then she got another one and got something called laryngotracheitis or Croup and needed mists and we did everything our pediatrician said. We thought her lungs were the biggest problem but the last week of March arrived and became a nightmare, even though that monday the pediatrician said everything was okay he decided to extend her treatment because Croup was still there. On wednesday we visited him again because she was constipated and he added a new treatment, we were anguished because she was crying a lot and it was unusual. Finally on friday she was restless during the day and in the night she couldn’t sleep and continued crying inconsolably. She started to go out. We left to the hospital on the early morning but when we arrived my girl had no vital signs. Anastasia Victoria Perdomo Matos, eight exact months since she came and left us just like that, leaving a void on us wondering why it had to be like this. It hurts deeply, I wake up every day thinking of how much I want her to be with me, by my side, wondering what else we could have done for her. After passing so many tests we thought the worse had happened. It is very hard, I only know I wish to see her again with all my heart, her gaze was perfect, it trasmitted so much and her smile was matchless. I love her so much it is so hard to understand this.

Thank you for sharing with the Phoenix Mothers Community, it is enriching to learn from one another, to know that many of us are chosen around the world to live a special motherhood that brings with itself great gifts and learnings. Allow yourself to discover this vision of love.

Tu instructora:

Patricia Mora
Life Coach Espiritual, Tanatóloga y Escritora

Es un hecho que los padres que tenemos uno o más bebés en el cielo necesitamos apoyo y orientación de calidad. Tenemos derecho a un espacio donde aprender y sentirnos contenidos y apoyados ante un duelo poco reconocido y sumamente doloroso. Después de ver a mis tres bebés trascender es mi misión transmitir mi experiencia, conocimientos y aprendizajes a cada ser humano que desea tomar una dirección de crecimiento, llena de significado y propósito.

Pin It on Pinterest

Share This